Still on my soapbox

My brother came out to me when I was fifteen. We were in a room with two of his friends and the boys were all home from their first semester of college. My reaction was...not the best. At all.

Outwardly, I was quiet, processing. Inwardly, I was an immediate disaster. Holy shit! What were my friends going to think? Was everyone at school going to think, gulp, I was GAY TOO? Ohmigosh, my already-meager social life was going to get anchored in some cement and dumped in the swamps by Giant's Stadium.

I was self-centered, selfish. Fifteen.

It never entered my realm of thoughts that Daniel was quite possibly going through turmoil of his own at that point. Didn't even cross my mind.

I think I've spent a chunk of the rest of my life trying to compensate for that initial reaction, the initial lack of support. I could've done better.

Which is why I get so angry sometimes, so fired up about civil rights, same sex marriage, hate crimes, and all the causes that I care about.

And which is why I am so sad about the rash of suicides by gay teens that is being reported all over the news right now. I know that the media tends to blow things out of proportion, but I guess I really feel like any suicide by anyone who has been driven to the limit by hateful people is one too many.

I consider myself so lucky that my brother came out in a safe environment - his college was an amazing haven for young people. He had good friends. And he had a family who loved him and (initial reactions by snotty teenagers notwithstanding) supported him through all the rest of the choices he had to make to really figure out who he was.

I can't imagine if we hadn't all been so damn lucky.

So when I saw today that Glee (my new favorite show - I can't help it!!) is planning an episode that tackles these tough issues, I was so grateful. They reach such a wide audience of teens (and those of us slightly older than that)...anyone they can educate is maybe one less person who will commit a hateful act. Please take a look at this video by Chris Colfer, who plays Kurt on the show. His message, that it will get better, is one I hope anyone in trouble will take to heart.

And now I will get back off my soapbox - my next post will be fun. I almost promise.