Random thoughts Tuesday

Whew - my brain is kind of all over the place. I'm sick (sinus infection - ugh), and work's been CRAZY busy (see what I meant about the end of a release cycle?), so I'm just exhausted.

But it's been a few days since I last wrote, so I thought I'd just provide some updates on life. I'm stealing Marissa's idea of Random Thought nights, so here goes.

• Book update: I think the last time I wrote about my book, I was maybe halfway through writing the first draft. I had no title, little confidence that I could ever finish, and I thought I was running out of ideas. But have no fear! I finished my rough draft before Christmas and have been hard at work editing ever since. I found a title, a voice for my narrator, and I've been able to sort through a lot of the garbage to pick out some good stuff. I'm super-excited about it, and hope to hand it off to some close friends/family for an initial read by early next month.
• Zoe update: She's finally healthy(ish)! Yay! She still has a cough but she's lost that walking zombie look that she had for over a week, and I swear....now that she's better, she's been EXTRA cute!! Today she borrowed another doll from her Nana, and promptly named it "Blue's Clues." Yeah - it's a girl doll, and her outfit is pink. But whatever. It's cute, dammit!
• Me update: I decided it was high time (in fact, it's long overdue) for me to go visit my brother, Daniel, and his husband, Zeke, in London, where they've been living for over two years. Since tickets are extremely pricey, I am going All By Myself next month, for Presidents' Day weekend. Holy cow, I'm so excited and so terrified that any time I think about it, I kind of, sort of want to throw up!! Holy cow! Five days without Charles and Zoe? Will I survive? I'll have to do some on-the-road blogging when I'm there.
• Politics update: I really, really, really want to stay awake tonight for the State of the Union Address. I am SO hoping President Obama knocks it out of the park!!! I also hope people are just nice to each other. So we'll see how that goes.

OK, I think that's enough for now. Hopefully I'll get some antibiotics when I go to the doctor tomorrow and then I'll be able to get my head together to write something more meaningful later in the week. In the meantime, I hope you're having a happy day. xoxoxoxo

When a children's book makes you think

I love when I come across something that makes me think. It could be a great article, movie, book, or a comment I overhear. This morning it was PUT ME IN THE ZOO by Robert Lopshire. If you haven't read it, you should. The message applies to adults, and I can't believe I never got it until now. I've read it a dozen times to my son but for some reason this morning, it just clicked.

For those who haven't read it, it's about an animal, although I'm not sure what kind of animal he is, who wants to live in the zoo. When two kids ask him why, why should he be in the zoo, the animal comes up with reasons as to why he thinks it would be great. But then the kids introduce him to the circus, and suddenly, he realizes that he shouldn't be in the zoo, he should be in the circus. The circus is the place for him.

If you don't quite get how big this message is, I'll explain. We could be spending our entire lives chasing a dream we constructed based on the few experiences we've had. Maybe we are hitting ourselves over the head wondering why our dreams aren't coming true, when actually, we are just chasing the wrong dreams.

If we don't try new things or expose ourselves to new people, ideas, concepts, and other ways of thinking, we could be chasing a dream that might not be the right dream for us. If we open ourselves up to new experiences, maybe our dreams will change for the better, and maybe we will find a dream that does come true.

See what I mean! This book is huge! If all I ever know is x, then I'll never discover y, and y could be the greatest thing ever.

Ok, maybe I'm laying the inspiration on thick, but I'm very enthusiastic this afternoon. So - this weekend, in honor of PUT ME IN THE ZOO, I will put myself in a new experience and see where it takes me.

Knowing my limits

I find myself drawn to TV shows, books, articles, and even movies that tell the story of those less fortunate, those in pain, or those who are going through something I hope I will never have to experience. My husband gives me a grief for wanting to read depressing stories. It's not that I like to hear depressing stories, I just tend to pause on them. I'm interested in how people cope, how they react, and at times, how they carry on with life.

It's usually safe to say that unless I have gone through the same experience as someone else, and in the same manner, I can't speak to exactly how they feel. I can guess as to what emotion the experience may leave behind, but I will never truly understand. So, when I find a book that lets me dive into the characters and feel what they are feeling, I become immersed. I think about the characters for days after I've finished reading. I ponder what they would have done if the situation was different. I examine why they chose to do what they did. I want to try my best to understand their emotional journey, and as a result, their choices.

This leads me to a book I recently caught wind of, ROOM by Emma Donoghue. With everything I said above, I'm not sure I can read this book. As a mother of a small son, something tells me this story may haunt me longer than others.

I want to understand the pain of others, but I'm not sure if I can handle the pain of a little boy. It may, for the first time, be a little too close to the heart.